FAKING IT By Cat Blaine

My second M/M book titled FAKING IT is out today! 



Hart Vanter has been pretending his whole life. He’s the wealthy son of rich parents and on the surface his life should be perfect. But he’s hiding a secret. He’s gay and terrified to let anyone know. So he sleeps with women and does everything he can to keep the facade intact.

 When his regular bodyguard is promoted Josh Lang appears on the scene to take his place. Josh is self-assured, gorgeous and gay. And he seems to know Hart’s secret. Josh is there to protect Hart, but can he save Hart from himself?


His curious gaze met mine. “Do you have a dirty little secret?” his voice was velvety, and it sent little shock waves through me.

I could feel my cheeks warming and I dropped my gaze to my papers. “Doesn’t everyone?”

“Nah. I’m an open book.”

I snorted. “I’m not. And that’s the way I like it.” I buried my nose in my spreadsheets, hoping he’d drop it. I wasn’t going to come clean about myself to anyone, let alone a guy who could be gone in a week to his next assignment.

The rest of the hour long trip we were quiet. My gaze would occasionally meet his in the mirror and slide away awkwardly. I was trying to concentrate on my laptop, but I had trouble. My curiosity about him was seeping into my thoughts. What was it about his lifestyle that had his parent’s panties in a bunch?

We arrived at our destination and I was forced to put my curiosity on hold. We rode up in the elevator together and were greeted by Theo, the son of the CEO for Randall’s Brake Pads. He was about my age and height, but he was thicker and had short red hair and bright blue eyes. We’d always been friendly, in fact I’d taken him out for drinks on numerous occasions when in town. It had been less fun than it sounds like though, because when Theo drank he wanted pussy. And that pretty much meant, either I had to go along with it, or stand out like a sore, gay thumb.

“Hey, Hart.” He grabbed my hand in an exuberant shake. “Dad’s pretty pissed.” He grinned.

“Hence my timely arrival bearing hefty discounts, and gifts,” I said, as I held up a big bottle of aged whiskey. “We know we screwed up, and we want to make it right.”

“This should help.” He took the bottle and then looked curiously at Josh. “You’re new.”

“I am.”

“This is, Josh,” I said introducing them. “Frank got a promotion.”

“Oh, please. He was probably begging to get off your detail. Guarding you must be the most boring job in the state.” His smile softened his words.

I spent the next two hours there groveling and promising the moon. Theo’s father raked me over the coals for about a half hour, and then left me in his son’s capable hands. I personally reentered the next year’s orders to ensure everything would be correct. Josh sat patiently waiting for me to finish up. He didn’t seem antsy at all, which was a nice contrast from Frank’s impatient shifting in his chair.

“Okay, who’s ready to go get some drinks?” Theo asked, slapping his hands on his desk. A couple of the interns sitting in the room with us brightened visibly, apparently game, as they high fived each other and nodded.

This was going to be a long evening. I wanted nothing more than to go home and put my feet up. You couldn’t exactly call me the picture of the fun loving rich kid today. I resembled a senior citizen more. I was still wrestling with depression from the evening before, and in no mood to pretend I wasn’t who I was. God all I needed was a repeat performance of last night, as I struggled to hold an erection with some chick. I met Josh’s gaze and maybe the desperation I felt was showing, because his eyes narrowed as he studied me. He suddenly stepped forward and cleared his throat.

“Hey, boss. Did you forget about that thing you have this evening?” His dark earnest gaze met mine, and if I hadn’t known better, I’d have believed I had something to do this evening too. I hesitated only briefly before seizing on his offered lifeline.

“Oh shit, that’s right.” I grimaced and met Theo’s disappointed gaze. “It’s something my dad set up last month, and I don’t dare cancel. It took us six months to get the meeting.” Oh, God I was probably going to go to hell. The lies just seemed to be rolling off my tongue so easily.

“Maybe next time, then?” Theo said frowning as he shook my hand.

“Definitely.” I agreed.

Josh and I rode down in the big glass elevator in silence, and I waited until we were to the car before I grabbed his shoulder, squeezing him warmly. “Holy shit, thank you.”

His expression was odd for a split second before he gave in to an easy laugh. “No problem.”

“How did you know?” I asked, amazed I was happily getting to go home instead of out whoring on the town.

“I read people pretty well.” He dropped his gaze, and moved from my grasp to open my door for me. “I could tell you were tired.”

I was a little disappointed he’d moved away. I’d enjoyed the feel of his muscles under my hand. I climbed in the back and he got behind the wheel. “Holy crap, I owe you big time. Can I buy you dinner tonight?”

He squinted at me. “You don’t have to do that.”

“Believe me. I could kiss you right now I’m so happy.” I ran my hands over my face, partly because I was tired, and partly because I was a little embarrassed by what I’d just blurted out. I could kiss you either way actually, that’s the only thing that might make this night even better.

“Nah. You’re tired, that’s okay.” He responded as he deftly steered onto the highway.

“We have to eat and I don’t mean anything fancy. I know this little Italian place I love. It’s super quiet, and near home. What do you say?” I cajoled him. “Boss is buying.”

He laughed, and my heart twittered at the husky sound of it. “I do love Italian.”

“In fact, we can just go home and walk there. It’s that close.” I was suddenly in a happy mood. “That way you can have a little vino with your food.”

“Oh, I shouldn’t drink much on duty.” He frowned.

“Just have one glass. I’ll drink the rest.” I wiggled my brows. “I love me the red wine.”

He gave a heartfelt laugh, and my toes curled momentarily from the beautiful sound of it. What was going on with me? I barely knew the guy and I was in heaven because he was willing to have dinner with me? He works for you. Don’t forget that.

I knew I needed to be careful and not get too attached to him. But I was bursting with good feelings right now, and I needed that desperately. I’d been so down lately struggling with my little problem of being a huge fake. So I stared out at the purple dusk, and the charming little twinkling white and golden lights of the city we were leaving. I closed my eyes, listening to the hum of the engine and I allowed myself to enjoy this moment. This quiet, peaceful snippet in time where I could convince myself that there might be a happy future for me someday, even as a little voice in my head whispered; You’re a phony and a fake and you’ll be found out eventually.


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